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The baby has come or is about to come and what can you expect? If you’re still waiting for the new one, you realize you’re about to enter a whole new unknown world. If your baby is here, you have found yourself thrown into the chaos of sleepless nights, diapering, feeding, attending to this wonderful being 24 hours a day. You suddenly have more to learn about and attend to than you have time or energy for.
I recently went through this myself, birthing three children in five years; they’re all about 18 months apart. I still remember what a contrast my old life was—house clean most of the time, quiet, peaceful, restful nights, a time when I could actually focus without interruption. My adjustment to new parenthood has been fun and adventurous, as well as challenging. I have considered what has helped me the most, and I hope these tips will help you, too.
1. GET THE LEAST EXPENSIVE STROLLER I hope you haven’t already spent a hundred dollars or more on a standard stroller. I guess some moms have gotten used to them, but in my experience, they are monsters. With three small children (or even one) I need something that is easy to drive and which I can maneuver with one hand when needed. I have discovered that the least expensive umbrella stroller is the best to use. You can go to Wal-Mart and get one for $10. They fold up easily, can be driven with one hand, and fit anywhere. I have strolled my baby in there as young as three months. When my babies were younger than that, I discovered that I could easily attach the infant car seat to the stroller—I just fit it in facing front, and used two strips of fabric to tie the top bar (in the back position) to the handles of the stroller. Obviously, if you do this, you have to assume responsibility for any risks, but it worked for me like a charm. I did once venture into trying the $30 umbrella stroller with an awning, but the awning broke within a month and it was much harder to maneuver than the $10 one. So I’ve learned that the cheaper the stroller, the easier it is to drive. By the way, I’ve also figured out how to use my strips of fabric to tie two umbrella strollers together, one slightly in front of the other, to make a double stroller. Easy as pie and still easy to drive! (Forget about those bars you can buy to attach them together—it won’t fit through a standard door!)
2. USE A BACKPACK DIAPER BAG Forget the standard diaper bag. We moms need use of both our hands as much as possible. When I started out, backpack diaper bags were unheard of. Now you can purchase backpacks made to be diaper bags. Get one of those or just a regular purse backpack; I bought mine for about $10. An ideal one would have two halves: one for the diaper bag, one for your purse items. Keep your purse and diaper bag items simple and organized (use ziplock baggies if you need to), and you’ll be set! A couple rules of thumb: always have one more diaper than you think you need; always have one change of clothes until the child is beyond potty-training; have a plastic bag to put soiled clothes in; and make sure you have a back-up binky or burp cloth or whatever your baby gets attached to, if applicable.
3. ORGANIZE YOUR HOME BEFORE BABY ARRIVES You won’t believe how much clutter a newborn can bring to a house! It all begins with that first baby. Get a head start by carefully planning and organizing ahead of time. Or, if baby is here, organize as soon as you can! Here are some things you’ll need:
A basket in every main room for toys. It’s a cinch to pick up all the toys and toss them into the basket at the end of the day, and your child can learn to do this independently at a very young age.
A well organized changing table: we use my old vanity. My babies could look at themselves in the mirror while being changed. I also like to put a bright poster on the ceiling directly above the changing table.
Designate a place in the kitchen for bibs, baby bottles, baby dishes & utensils, etc. or they will take over your counters and drawers.
Organize baby clothes in boxes by gender, season & size in a storage area. You’ll be going through baby clothes every two or three months.
Keep large items to a minimum or they will take over your house. In our cozy bungalow, we decided not to have a baby swing, as it would take up too much room. I would often have my baby rocking in the infant car seat with toys across the bar, so I never bought one of those “infant hammock seats” either. We do have one “johnny jump-up” seat which folds easily for storage. Think carefully about bringing large items into your home.
4. FIND A WAY TO GET YOUR SLEEP I know this sounds impossible, but it can be done! There are several books out there on how to help your baby sleep through the night. My friends and I have found that the method described in "On Becoming Babywise" and "On Becoming Babywise II" by Gary Ezzo and Dr. Robert Bucknam works wonders! All of my babies were sleeping through the night by eight weeks old! I learned from experience that when I carefully followed this method my babies slept through the night, and when I didn’t, they didn’t. It’s like night and day. Our sleep is so important; our personality changes when we haven’t had enough. For me it’s the difference between being joyful and patient with my children or irritable and upset at every little thing. Every parent can relate to this, and we all need our sleep—our babies do, too. Try it and see for yourself—you’ll be a new person once you start getting some sleep!
5. RELAX AND ENJOY! This stage will be over before you know it, and babies are so precious. Enjoy this time fully. I once met an older woman who wished she were back at this stage of life again. My youngest is now a toddler and I am already missing having a sweet baby to care for. One of the best ways to enjoy your new baby is to make sure you take time for yourself, every day if possible. This could be as simple as a bubble bath at the end of the day, or reading a great novel, or working on a hobby. As you take care of your own needs, you’ll be able to better care for and enjoy your growing family. Choose to be joyful today, and your whole family will benefit.
I hope these tips encourage and enable you to be a successful, joyful parent. They should also give you an idea of what’s ahead. Good luck and happy parenting to you!
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